May 30th, 2011
So in the past 5 years of really focusing on learning about fitness and working out I have discovered something.. a whole lot of gas!! Really, from yoga to powerlifting the one thing they have in common is that at some point a squeaker escapes! So.. I brought back a blog from awhile ago that I think really captures the moment… enjoy!
Really it’s like burping a baby…
I debated if I was going to share this little story with you, but in light of my determination to have open and comfortable communication with you about day to day life, things that we can all relate to even if we don’t always discuss it with civilized friends, I must. Chances are good if you haven’t had this experience yet, it’s coming. You will either do it yourself, or have to deal with someone who has..
Good luck with that.
Yesterday was a lovely day! I was running a titch behind so instead of my usual “SlimStyles” shake for breakfast I had the breakfast wrap at Starbucks (230 calories and yummy!) and a coffee. (Slightly burnt taste or not still better than the station dredge.) We had fun with the show, got my production work done and headed home to make sure I ate something before heading to “Twist” for my work out with Kaalun!
So instead of my “shake” for breakfast I had it for lunch! Seemed like a pretty good plan, the shake has a good mix of everything I need along with the PGX which really does help me feel full and seems to be doing a great job leveling off my blood sugar levels!
Yesterday was a “core” work out day.
OK.. time to explain what happened..
So we are working on a Bosu ball doing something that is supposed to look like this:
Let’s just say. I try. Yesterday I was trying hard.. Kaalin is counting and being encouraging and I am doing the best I can.. my tummy is gurgling a bit and I feel slight “discomfort” but don’t really think anything of it and keep on going!
Kaalun is called away for a brief moment, and I keep on going.. That funny feeling seems to be returning.. OH NO. Light bulb time! My SlimStyles does have a nice warning, about the fiber, which can make you need to use the bathroom a bit more and make you a touch gaseous.
Between the ab work and the SlimStyles I can sense an eruption of unlady like proportions on the way! I look around the gym. Empty! Thank goodness.. no sign of Kaalun. Good! I just might have a little “toot.”
No little “toot” here, you might as well break out the entire brass section! I did my husband proud as I let go of a good old school fart! As a matter of fact, I am pretty sure it had enough force to move my shorts a little!
Thank goodness no one is in the gym and it is odorless. Wait.. Just as Kaalun is heading back in I realize that odorless it is NOT! While part of me (the inner 5 year old) wants to laugh and lay claim, the very adult Susan is HORRIFIED.
Operation “Stop Kaalun Now” swings into effect.. I leaped up and headed off to the other side of the gym to meet him as he came in.. weaving just in case the smell was following me (see I have learned something from my husband!) Kaalun is looking confused. Here is how I explain it;
Kaalun: Hey! Are you done those crunches!
Susan: ummmmmmmm.. no..
Kaalun: Well let’s get..
Susan: Remember how I told you about the shake I had..
Kaalun: (Looking perplexed) Yes..
Susan: Do you know how to burp a baby?
Kaalun: (looking more perplexed) yes…
Susan; Did you ever stop to think that crunches are like burping a baby..
Kaalun: (Looking even more perplexed)
Susan: But for the other end.
Kaalun: (light bulb moment followed by look of mixed horrification and amusement) OK.. Let’s work on this side of the gym and move on from crunches..
So my friends, if you have ever experienced this, have worried about experiencing this, or have wondered if the person next to you in the gym just experienced it.. it does happen. Sometimes we need to listen to the inner five year old and just lay claim. Yup.. that belonged to me and I’m leaving it here for you to enjoy… and leave the room with your head held high.. while people pass out around you.
Maybe one day if your lucky I will tell you what happened to me the first time I deadlifted 255 pounds!